Unconditionally Loved
In Matthew 15 we find the story of a Canaanite woman who came to Jesus because she wanted Him to heal her daughter. Jesus tells her he was sent to the Jews and it wouldn’t be right to take the “children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.” (vs. 26) The woman responds “even the dogs feed on the crumbs that fall from their master’s table.” (vs. 27) Jesus proceeds to tell her she has great faith and her daughter was healed at once.
I never really understood this portion of scripture until I heard a pastor share a question he asked the Lord concerning this story. He asked the Lord “If you were going to heal the daughter all along, why didn’t you just heal her to begin with?” He shared how the Lord revealed to him that the woman was pretending to be a Jew. In vs 22 she cries out “Have mercy on me, Lord, Son of David.” Only Jews could refer to Jesus as the Son of David. If Jesus had healed her daughter at the beginning of the story, she would have felt like she had to continue pretending anytime she needed something from him. And Jesus wanted her to know she could come to him as she was without pretending to be someone or something she isn’t. Jesus wanted her to know she could be honest and real with him. He wanted her to know He loved her unconditionally.
I have a picture of Jesus I came across while reading the book “Heaven is for Real”. It hangs on my wall. It’s the place I go when I need and want to pour out my heart to him. What I’m always amazed by is how at the times when I think I’m at my ugliest (cursing at him because of the buried anger and pain inside he’s agitating because he’s attempting to heal me) I sense his presence the most. How can it be? How can it be when I’m being so ugly towards him he seems to want me to know He loves me? It’s like the Canaanite woman. When she finally admitted to the truth of who she was, Jesus was able to perform the miracle she longed for. I got a miracle just last week. For most of my life I’ve longed to feel loved. I would talk to God about it asking things like “can’t you just sent someone to love me” but couldn’t see that the problem actually resided in my heart concerning what I believed about myself. Over the last several weeks I’ve sensed God showing me that if I don’t love myself how can I receive (and feel) love from Him and others. I finally gathered up the courage to ask God to help me to love myself and that meant I needed to face the truth about what I really believed about myself. It seemed the curse words spoken over me when I was young had taken root in my heart. As I allowed the Lord to bring up the truth of what was in my heart what came up was “I am a horrible person.” Somehow the mistakes I made as a child had branded me “a horrible person” and my heart received that lie instead of the truth that God loves me unconditionally. As Jesus exposed this lie to the light, it broke. In HIS grace, he showed me the truth and healed my heart. I am HIS daughter and I AM loved.
May we all continue to grow in knowing who we are so we can believe in and receive the unconditional loved by our amazing Abba Father. God bless each and every one of you!
Photo by Caroline Hernandez on Unsplash
